There are a few tell tale signals that society is going to hell in a hand basket. The first is that people sit around on bar stools all day criticizing others while offering nothing productive in return. Yes, it hits a little close to home, but it’s rather unavoidably obvious, now isn’t it?
An even more obvious sign that the apocalypse is hitting, though, lies with the simple observation of Monday morning habits in the office.
First off, it’s a generally accepted rule of a civilized society that the first person in the office – particularly on a Monday – does not make a pot of decaf coffee first.
Never!
Bloody hell, people, that’s a mortal sin.
But, wait, that’s not all!
Making decaf may have been a mistake. Granted, a mistake that earns one a non-stop, shinkansen bullet train ticket to hell; but, in the end, just a mistake. There’s still hope for saving your entire family from a fate of eternal damnation. That punishment is reserved for the cretin idiots who stop making coffee after their pot of decaf is completed.
WTF?
Would it kill you to at least start a pot of “real” coffee before you slink off to your cube and your miserable, decaffeinated existence?
There was once an age of civilization where people dressed up to fly on commercial airplanes, where restaurants, movies, and everyplace in-between weren’t disturbed with incessant mobile phone chatter, and when people had the collective common decency and courtesy to brew more than just their own shitty decaf coffee.
Yes, the apocalypse is upon us, and just one more reason to slip a little Bailey’s Irish Crème into your morning coffee.
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